Monday, June 11, 2007

BUMMER

As you well know, my mind is on 1 thing these days...or at least it was.

There are not many things that I have a fear of. Thanks to a Daddy who taught me that there was nothing I could not do if I just tried. (Thanks, Pop) But, a fear I have never conquered is my fear of the dentist. I put off going as long as I can, and only make the appointment when there is no other way out. Yes, I know this is irrational, and silly.....well, it's just plain stupid, really. And, my mind knows that...but my soul still feels like running for the hills. And, I do not know why I have this fear, or why it is so strong.....but it is. I have prayed for help in overcoming it, but so far....it's as strong as ever. Several years ago, I began having a terrible toothache, and I knew I had to find some help fast. I had run into a high school friend recently and she told me she was a dental assistant. So, I called her and asked for "HELP!" She tried to calm my fears and said to come right then. Because I did not think I could pull the offending tooth from my head...I went. The dentist was wonderful. She was very calm and understanding. And, she promised not to hurt me. And she didn't. I ended up having to have 2 root canals and never felt a thing. Not even pain afterwards. She got me all fixed up, and I promised myself that I was going to go regularly from then on. I didn't. And, now a part of a filling has fallen out. And I have been paralyzed. I leave for my trip on Saturday, and I was toying with the idea of taking a chance that all would be well, and I could wait till I got back. I knew I should call and see about this...but I could not make the call. I am such a fool. Don saw me wincing and asked about it, and told me I WAS GOING TO FIX IT........NOW! He called today and they will see me on Wednesday. Which is fine, because it is not hurting...it is just rough on my tongue. Plus, that gives me another day and a half to work myself up into a twisted mess. I am ashamed of myself for being like this...and for not going back to see her sooner, and now I am in a mess and it's time for my trip, and why didn't I just do the right thing, but I am so scared, and this is silly and it serves me right, and ...and...and...

Just say a prayer for me, my friends...obviously I need it....BAD!

8 comments:

Dianne said...

Look...I hate dentists too! I went one time for 10 years without going, no kidding! When I finally did go, I just had some fillings that needed to be replaced. I got two of them done and didn't go back! First of all, I don't like going, but second, it's EXPENSIVE when you don't have dental insurance! I am a fanatic about brushing my teeth and all 'oral care' stuff, but I know I still need to go to the dentist at least once year! I feel your pain sister! And I will definitely pray that your fears will lessen..or better yet go away totally!

Also, thanks for your sweet note on my blog the other day about being creative about keeping in touch when my nieces move...it was just what I needed to hear...or should I say 'read'? Thank you.

Musicaljean said...

I'll pray for you, my dear. My daughter is just like you.

I had very bad experiences as a child getting fillings WITHOUT novacaine. But somehow I've been able to overcome my fear and I've been pretty regular with seeing a dentist most of my adult life.

Lord, we ask you to let Your peace rest upon Tonja these next two days.

justabeachkat said...

I know others who feel the same way. Luckily, I don't. Our dentist is a friend of ours and I enjoy going just so I can catch up on the latest with his two sweet daughters. I'll be thinking of you. I'm so glad you're going before your trip. It would be a "bummer" if it started giving you problems in Hawaii.

RealEstateGirl said...

I can't say that I share your fear of dentists, since I used to be a Dental Assistant for several years...but, know that you'll feel much better once you get it taken care of and then you'll be able to enjoy your time in Hawaii!

Tonja said...

Thank-you , my friends. I so appreciate all your kind words. You all are such a blessing to me.

Lynne said...

I had a terrible fear of dentists too, but was able to overcome it because I found a very compassionate dentist who understood fear.

Are you going to the same dentist that you went to before? You know that she was gentle before - she will be again.

Leah Belle said...

I'm with you, girl! I DO NOT like the dentist. I'm famous for going YEARS without seeing the dentist. Fortunately for me, I have great teeth. I recently (at 35 years of age) had my 1st cavity!

Iris Godfrey said...

May you find the presence of our Lord as you sit in the dentist chair. Look for Him. He will help.