Tuesday, April 28, 2009



I vow that I will never eat
Another of those tasty treats.

The chocolate's good---it tastes so real
So why should I not eat my fill?

What it did to me--I shudder to tell
Suffice to say--it did it well.

On the package back--way down low
Are the teeny words that you should know.

A serving is 5- that's what they say
But, I only ate 3 that fateful day.

Now, you should NEVER eat a lot
Or something's gonna start--and it's not gonna stop!

You'll cry--you'll moan--you'll pull your hair
You'll scream--you'll yell--you'll say a prayer.

You swear this has to be the end...
Surprise! Surprise! It's back again!

So, the next time that you're craving these
You are much better off with a piece of cheese.

As much as I wish to be thin--
I'll never eat one of these again!

This was written a while ago, but I lost it and have just run across it again. I wrote this soon after 'the experience' because this is something I never wanted to happen to me again. Do you know the word 'projectile'? I'm just saying. And, for the record...Regular, FULL SUGAR, Reese's P-Nut Butter Cups have never had such a negative effect on my body...that is unless you count that little extra roll around my mid section.


Musicaljean said...

Believe me, the sugar-free peppermint patties do the same thing. Oh baby. I found out the really hard way one Saturday night. I think I ate the whole little bagful. Served me right, I guess.

Keetha said...

Very cute, very funny - - - TO READ, not to experience, and very creative.

I'd stick to the real candy myself.

I've heard of this particular side effect of sugar free candy - - - happened to my nephew a while back and he's just a YOUNG whipper snapper in his 20's.

nancygrayce said...

I just laughed so hard!!! The fat free chips do me in! I tried those reese cups at mama's once and I didn't like them! I want real sugar!!!

Love Being a Nonny said...

The fat free sugar free frozen yogurt keeps me on the toilet...ugh. Give me the real stuff. i have felt your pain. All that fake stuff HAS to be bad for us. Give me REAL sugar!

andi said...

crackin' me up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Paula (SweetPea) said...

I've heard of chips made of oleo or something like that (a fake fat) can make one's insides do flip flops and come out the other end (bottom end).

I've never had a bad reaction to any of the sugar-free candies. Each body is created uniquely by God though.

LivingTheLife said...

If I were an attorney...I would say..." I rest my case"...just goes to prove the REAL thing is the BEST! I'll take the extra roll OR I'll exercise more...but I do like the REAL thing!

Sorry this happened to you...but as usual you turned it into something we could ALL get a "giggle" from...I won't say it was at your expense...but it kinda was...thanks for sharing...I'll stick to the real deal.


Sherrie said...

Too funny! ....the poem not your experience. I agree with everyone else...give me the real stuff!!!!